Marvel’s The Avengers (2012)

It all leads up to this, “The Avengers.” Earth’s Mightiest Heroes, assembled in one massive movie, based on the must-read comic book that tied together the vast Marvel Universe like the quickest game of Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon, month after month for decades. And still going strong, print-wise. Cinema-wise, after “Iron Man” 1 and 2, two “Hulk” movies (one in 2003 now disowned, the other in 2008 grudgingly accepted), “Thor” and “Captain America,” we now have the comic book movie of the year. 

Sorry, “Dark Knight Rises.” (For now.)

The Avengers is an unlikely team of super heroes: Captain America, Iron Man, Thor, the Hulk, Hawkeye and Black Widow, joined by SHIELD Agent Nick Fury in one massive film. (Classic B-side comic book characters such as Ant-Man and Wasp must wait for a sequel I guess.) The plot follows the book’s lead: The team fights intergalactic threats, a power-mad super villain, and/or more likely each other or another Marvel hero, Iron Man vs. Thor, Wolverine vs. Hulk, or everyone vs. Hulk. Those later fights were more exciting than any run-of-the-mill story of hero against villain, on the page. Who to root for? 

Does the “Avengers” movie live up to the years of hype? Never could. I dreamed about this movie all the childhood, and it’s a work of pop-art summer flick beauty for a boy who got himself happily lost inside three-color panels and myriad crossover cliffhangers for much of his childhood. It contains the single greatest ripped-from-a-comic-book-scene ever on film: The Hulk smashes a villain around as if he were a sock monkey, and drops a one-liner as he walks off, satisfied with his big, green, angry self. Cheer!

But that comes at the end, and I need to start at the beginning: We open in space – evil mumbling abound about the destruction of Earth, by a freakish, hooded alien of some sort. Loki – the villainous brother of Thor, both the hero and the namesake 2011 film, played by Tom Hiddleston – is to lead the charge. He zaps to Earth through a portal that opens at the headquarters of the super-secret spy group SHIELD, the latter tinkering with a glowing blue Cosmic Cube thingy that promises unlimited energy. (Confused? You have not watched the earlier films. Go back to start.) Loki wreaks havoc, taking prisoners and under-mining the Mo-Fo that is Fury (Samuel L. Jackson). 

The first 20 minutes is all SHIELD, an odd introduction, but director/ screenwriter Joss Whedon (TV’s “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” and “Firefly”) is easing us into this massive universe, bringing in his team one member at a time. We hop from America to Germany then to a massive floating aircraft carrier (straight out of the comic books) and then to New York City for a 40-odd minute battle finale, complete with massive creatures reminiscent of the sandworms in “Dune,” floating above the skyline. 

So, yes, it’s a Michael Bay “Transformers” finale with smashed buildings and fleeing extras, but Whedon whets our appetites (mine anyway) with long shots of the heroes, standing in a circle, backs to each other, ready to fight, and every hero -– even the relatively unexplored Hawkeye and Black Widow – gets a shining moment. Captain America, in the middle of the battle, takes charge of the team as the only man with real-war experience. Iron Man blasts his way through canyons of skyscrapers. 

Then there’s that beaut scene with Hulk and sock monkey Loki. It’s everything you want in a comic book, outlandish action with wit as Loki lays hyper-ventilating and thinks, “What am I doing?” It’s a stellar Whedon moment, and one of many surprises, including the strong touches of humor (Harry Dean Stanton as a security guard) and sad (a major character dies, but he’s not that major). 

The real Whedon coup, though, is fitting all these heroes and actors into one film and making it work – Chris Evans as Captain, Robert Downey Jr. as Iron Man, Chris Hemsworth as Thor, Scarlett Johansson as Black Widow, Jeremy Renner as Hawkeye, and Mark Ruffalo as Bruce Banner/Hulk. Major names mixed in with minor names, and of course Downey rules the roost with his Tony Stark strut and outsize ego, but Ruffalo uses nerdy charm to win scene after scene. When minor-league Evans -- he can’t compete with Oscar nominees -– steps up to the plate to take over the team, we’re cheering for the actor as much as we are the character. 

I never thought a live-action film of the Avengers could be pulled off, but Whedon has done it. It’s not perfect -- that plot is weak, in case you didn't notice, Loki’s lizard baddies are faceless and void of personality, but Downey’s Stark can drop a shawarma reference out of the blue, and make it sing. Comic book love. If “Dark Knight Rises” threatens to lean too far to tragic importance, “Avengers” is bright, bold fun, with the inner-fights of heroes, and their coming together against a world threat a reminder of the best of all humanity. So, in the sequel, Vision please! Confused? Go back to the comic books. And as Stan Lee always said, “Exclsior!” A-

Bully (2012)

“Bully” is a brutal documentary look at five stories of youths bullied, beaten, and taunted by peers, and ignored by clueless or uncaring adults. It brings anger and tears, especially for a guy who was himself heckled. Three stories (a lesbian, a boy with cognitive/emotive issues, and a poor girl pushed to violence) are told in present tense; two in past tense as the tormented committed suicide rather than live miserable. Director Lee Hirsch takes inside schools, on buses, and into the homes of its subjects. He shows an 11-year-old’s casket, and a broken father whisper, “We need to tuck him in one last time,” to his wife as they follow behind it. Brutal. Its strength lays in damning school administrators who dismiss the concerns of parents and youths, opting to say “just get along,” outright lie, or change the subject and talk about their new grand baby. But, hate to pick, it’s not a full-rounded film: Every story is set in rural America, no cities whatsoever, and Hirsch never confronts the bullies. Why not? Last thought: It’s a crime the MPPA bullied “Bully” with an R-rating, when “Hunger Games” got a PG-13. Senseless. B+

Dark Shadows (2012)

Are there two men more likely soul mates than actor Johnny Depp and director Tim Burton? Can there be any doubt these guys make their films first for each other, us second. “Dark Shadows” is a prime example: A supernatural off-kilter oddball of cinema, and a mash letter/ homage to a cult hit TV series that Depp and Burton adored 40 years ago. If it only worked, if only the film had an air about it more substantial than the feeling Depp and Burton are really saying, “You need to see this show!” Well, why not the movie? 

The story: Barnabas Collins is the son of a wealthy fishing magnate in 1760s America who spurns his housemaid f-buddy (Eva Green) for his true love Josette (Bella Heathcote) – to eternal punishment, for the angry lady, Angelique, is hell in heels, a witch with an endless temper. She kills Barnabas’ family and his true love, and then makes him a vampire, cursed for eternity, before locking his ass in a coffin for 196 years. Ouch. Rocket to 1972, and a newly released Barnabas finds himself in the timeline of Nixon, Karen Carpenter, and lava lamps. Angelique awaits, rich and powerful, lording over the Collins heirs (led by Michele Pfeiffer, wonderfully sour). 

It’s all ripe for satire, culture jokes and hippie-munching humor, and we get all that, but we don’t get enough of the tragic romance, the eternal desire Barnabus has for his lost love, Josette, and her 1972 reincarnation, Victoria. Yes, there’s a reincarnation. During the climatic “Death Becomes Her”-riffing battle that $100 million budgets can buy, I barely noticed, and the film barely acknowledges, the long absences of the lady who unwittingly started it all. Oh, wait, there she is! At the end! Sigh. 

Depp – once again in chalky white makeup and creepy black wig, his signature Burton look -- is perfect in the lead role of Barnabas, slowly rolling his fangs around every word, gesture and arched eyebrow. He makes his vamp into a gentleman in line with the great dapper vampire Christopher Lee (who has a cameo), but one vexed by Eggo waffles and Steve Miller Band song lyrics. 

A huge part of me wished Burton, Depp, and screenwriter Seth Grahame-Smith (author of “Pride, Prejudice and Zombies”) had gone for a grisly, out-of-control hard R, ala “Sleepy Hollow,” a far darker comedy than this wink-wink lightweight romp can provide in a PG-13. Among the missed opportunities – besides sweet buckets of blood – is a cameo by ’70s shock rocker Alice Cooper, who Barnabas calls “the ugliest woman I never met.” Heh. Even the jokes are lodged in the 1970s. 

End note: I miss the Burton of “Beetlejuice” And “Edward Scissorhands.” Yeah, the special effects were (purposefully) cheap, but, damn, I left fulfilled with cinematic glory. The original show was all about cheapness, apparently, but this film spared no expense. For sets and makeup and special effects. Dime store story, though. Not Dark enough. B-

The Hunger Games (2012) and Battle Royale (2000)

Suzanne Collins’ “The Hunger Games” trilogy stirs up the ultimate taboo as its selling points: Children, forced by an Orwel government, hunt and kill each other in a techno-possible “Most Dangerous Game” scenario. Until only one remains. Crazy scary.

The first book adaptation is solid, for the most part. The story: In the ruins of what was once America, now Panem, Appalachian-bred teen Katniss (Jennifer Lawrence) illegally hunts to feed her coal-miner family alive, with dad dead and no brother around. When her tween sister is drafted to participate in the nation’s Hunger Games –- the Richard Connell challenge -–Katniss volunteers to take the suicide mission, partnered with a local baker’s son (Josh Hutcherson). At the Capital City -– think the most vile capitalist dreamscape, with bad hair color –- the public awaits its entertainment, with Donald Sutherland as ruler and Wes Bentley (“American Beauty”) as game master. 

Director Gary Ross and his writers nail the horrors of the children murdering children, without going overboard. A split decision, as maybe going overboard is needed? The film exceeds its PG-13. Why not go mall the way? Further limits: The screenplay skimps on some emotions and deeper threads found in the book, mostly on dead dad, which damages dampens the drama in a major way. But, tech geek “Wired”-wise,  Ross smartly takes us behind the scenes of the games, to show the techno-marvel perversion of these Apple on crack fascists, with no small nod to America’s past use of The Draft to send teenagers out to die for God, country, mom, apple pie, and a stronger stock market. 

Sutherland grins hungry with Cheney-esque malice and sleaze, but this is Lawrence’s film. The “Winter’s Bone” star kills here, starved and scared, yet strong, and she refuses to be identified by any label other than “sister,” and it’s a joy to watch -– especially in light of “Twilight,” which shot on young women as slaves to the men in their lives. Fuck that.

Amazing imagery abounds: None better than a young black girl, mortally wounded, lying in Katniss’ arms, bleeding out as Primrose -– that baby sister –- would have. The scene hurts as much as it did off the page. A rare trick that. That moment, one knows the Oscar nom Lawrence received for “Bone” is no fluke. B+

If you’re in the mood for a grisly double feature about children killing other children, again for sport, then you must see the infamous, “Battle Royale.” But it’s a dare. The gore.violence in this Japanese flick remains so intense, it was banned for a decade in many countries, and only now just received a DVD release stateside. It is a must watch, but not for anyone young or sensitive: The bloodletting of youth here may never be surpassed.

We’re in Japan, a future (now our past) where the world economy has collapsed, jobs are vapor, and a twin devil of anarchy and uncertainty reigns. Sound familiar? To reel in the run-amok youth, the government takes one class of students each year, kidnaps them, puts them on an island, and ticks off with ESPN clarity the bloody carnage and body count. 

“Royale” also was based on a controversial book, and many believe it actually inspired Collins’ books, with her as a copycat. The game master (Takeshi Kitano) here is a former principal with an ax to grind, and he viciously slays two students before the “games” even begin. The urvivors are then given a weapon, survival gear, and orders -– kill or be killed. 

If the youth refuse their homicidal orders, an explosive collar around their neck detonates. Sick. Right? Further sickness: The children here, though, all hail from the same class, and harbor friendships, crushes, parental friends, and festered hates. Actors Tatsuya Fujiwara and Aki Maeda are the lovebirds, while Chiaki Kuriyama -– she later played a psychopath in “Kill Bill” -– is the girl who sees the kill island as new inspiration. 

This is twisted stuff and director Kinji Fukasaku pulls no punches with violence that borders on unwatchable, and kills loved characters with no mercy. This film cannot be interrupted as celebrating violence, each death is more heinous than the last, and as the film draws on, the flashbacks and dreamy asides flesh out the characters onscreen, even if some scenes cross far too fantastical or too sentimental. (Note: I watched an extended director’s cut, the original may not have some of these scenes.)  

“Royale” has its own faults: The teens coo having never heard of this TV run-a-mok, even though the opening scene shows the games are required viewing of all citizens. Amnesia? Denial? Hell, no ... despite denials ... maybe the Collins took her ideas from here after all… A-

Underworld: Awakening (2012)

My wife loves the “Underworld” flicks, she thinks Kate Beckinsale as bad ass vampire assassin Selene who kicks ass in a slick tight black jumpsuit is a hoot. That’s true, but “Awakening,” the fourth pitch in the creaky vampires-and-werewolves-live-among-us action series is so short on story and reason to exist, it’s painful. Here Selene –- centuries old and still sporting hair and skin only a salon can provide -– is iced for 12 years, wakes up in a  badly lit lab run by an icky corporation that must share a set with the “Resident Evil” films, slices though a busload of men, hunts for her lover (Scott Speedman) who is starring in a better film, and tries to protect her new tween-scream daughter. It’s all set in a dark Orwellian world where all the survivors pimp “GQ” threads, the lighting –- inside and out, night or day -- is all black-blue, and “The Matrix” is the only film ever made. This is a cheat on every level, an extended trailer with 1,999 shots of Beckinsale standing in front of a massive fan just off camera, her black leather slicker blowing righteously so. D+

The Killer Elite (2011)

In “The Killer Elite,” Jason Statham is another badass with a temper, a gun, and a mission. Upfront: This is one of those “based on a true story” stories that screams bullshit! as the action spreads around the globe, double-crosses pile up, and Statham as assassin-for-hire Danny Bryce endures punishment so grim and commits stunts so brazen, they would kill all Three Stooges and Ethan Hunt. Story: A gravely ill sheikh strong arms Danny into offing the three Brit SAS agents who killed his brave sons, leaving pops with a sad-sack brat so nancy, he makes Fredo Corleone glower like, well, Jason Statham. If Danny says no, Poppa Sheik kills Robert De Niro, or rather a spry old spy played by Robert De Niro. The acting is aces, and the action all wrought iron hard curves and twists, but FML, newcomer writer Matt Sherring and director Gary McKendry go all tit-tit, blanching at violence, and mere seconds later dive into their next set-piece where Stathom rips apart packs of men. Brain drivel mediocre. Clive Owen -– stealing the film -- co-stars as an ugly spook who we only think is a villain. Alas, all bullshit. B-

The Fly (1986) and The Fly II (1989)

David Cronenberg’s nightmare love story horror flick “The Fly” is mad genius, sickly twisted, and lets Jeff Goldblum spin gold as a loner nerd scientist named Seth Brundle who wants to change the world as we know it. He doesn’t, but sure as hell changes his own corner when a teleportation experiment goes wrong and he zaps himself and a house fly from one souped-up self-built transport pod to another, two go in, one comes out. Cronenberg fires on all bloody cylinders, starting with a romance between Goldblum and Geena Davis as a reporter, then sci-fi fantasy, then body horror as Seth morphs to a superman assured he has jumped the evolutionary ladder to mad man when his body starts falling apart, and becoming ... another. Twenty-six years on “Fly” still shocks with Goldblum’s transformation under makeup, and then the stop-motion creatures that replace him. The lines are cheesy – “Be afraid! Be very afraid!” – but the visuals burn deep, as does Cronenberg’s obsession with dying and disease. Last note: Mr. C must release a director’s cut soon: Check out a cut scene on YouTube, as Seth makes a monkey-cat as part of his own healing scheme shown later. Insane. A

In “The Fly II,” Cronenberg buzzes off to better films, and we’re stuck with Chris Walas – the makeup guy on the first film – as director of a “Like Father, Like Son” spookfest. Let’s give it points: “Fly II” flies in a different direction as Martin, the mutant flyboy of Goldblum’s scientist and Davis’ reporter, is raised inside a mega-corp lab, and as a 20-year-old (really 5) falls in love, all flowers and dancing sweet. Sure as hell, though, we get a grisly transformation and all goes to shit fast with bad visual effects and a LOL “Alien” rip off as Marty McFly (tee-hee!) goes on a bender against his surrogate Mr. Burns daddy, so boring bad, he could be a 1970s Disney villain. Lee Richardson is the old man, and Eric Stoltz – he did “Mask” before this – is young Martin. It’s all a maggot baby so unworthy of Cronenberg I wanted to take a rolled-up magazine and … well, you know. C

Pina (2011)

Ignorance truly is bliss. I knew nothing of the documentary film “Pina,” or Pina Bausch, the avant-garde choreographer and subject of this brilliant movie/eulogy, when I entered the theater. What a wonderful education. Bausch was a German-born contemporary dance performer/ instructor/artist/feminist/chain-smoker who died weeks after agreeing to let director Wim Wenders (you know him, right?) make a 3D documentary of her work. She died and then the film died, but her dancers/followers/disciples resurrected the latter to honor the former. An Easter miracle. This is one of the films of 2011, documentary category and overall, shot in glorious big-screen 3D, which I sadly missed out on. 

Wenders starts his film on stages and dance studios within literal film frames, and then takes us out onto the streets, industrial parks, public swimming pools, EL trains, parks, and mountains of Pina’s home country, her dancers, young and old, performing works that touch on love, nature, water, and violence, the movement onscreen and the music so new and thrilling to these naïve eyes and ears, so energetic and beautiful, I was spell bound. He skips the boring this-than-that-happened of most bio-docs and lets Pina’s art speak for her as we watch men and women contort their bodies in unspeakable ways, out of tribute, love and joy. 

The best/most disturbing sequence has a pack of men picking/ jabbing/clutching a woman, it’s harrowing to behold, but amazing: Pina showing how sexist, condescending men openly treat women as a meat product or a car, an object to be bought. No heart. And yet Pina’s heart still beats damn strong. A must watch and listen. A