Captain America: The First Avenger (2011)

In what may be the most spectacular use of CGI since Gollum shat on Frodo’s life in “The Lord of the Rings,” the director, Joe Johnston, and producers, Marvel Comics, of “Captain America: The First Avenger” have gone back in time, found footage of my high school/early college self, and transported the images of my 90-pound bony white ass to modern day. The corker: They painted on the face of actor Chris Evans on my head. (I was goofy looking. Evans is not.) Amazing.

This imagery – all kidding aside, how did they do that!?! – makes up the first bit of the best comic book movie adaptation this side of “The Dark Knight” or “Iron Man.” Based on Marvel’s first hero, “Captain America” is the story of a weakling made into a warrior who takes down a power-mad off-shoot of the Nazis, called Hyrda, during World War II. He becomes a national icon. Great concept. Always was.

The movie is shot to look true to 1940s period, is fun as heck, and proudly, but not boastfully, patriotic. Cherry on top: Evans is every bit the superhero (he played the Human Torch in “Fantastic Four” before this) that Ryan Reynolds failed to be in “Green Lantern.” There’s no wink, but it’s loose enough not to be mistaken for the lead in, say, “The Lives of Others.” Pure comic book glory.

I went in mixed, blood full of a lifelong comic book fan’s demands, and yet cynical that a film in 2011 could pull off the comic’s silly costume and flag-waving, “Stars and Stripes Forever” patriotism. I also did not see how they would pull off the Red Skull, the madman Nazi scientist in need of a dermatologist. The comic books have seen their share of tumult during several decades (as has the nation itself) even going as far as killing off Cap several years back. A bad 1990s film exists, as does a 1970s TV short series of movies. Crap. But here he is, in big screen glory. Cap. The Red Skull makeup looks more rubber dog toy than bone, but ... I got past it. Mostly.

Oh, yes, the plot: Young Brooklyn nerd Steve Rogers (Evans) is a Tinker Toy thin kid who wants to serve and fight Hitler in 1942 America. It’s his duty, he says, why wouldn’t he? (How utterly cool is that?) But he gets 4F’d as soon as he takes off his shirt and smiles, like an overeager puppy. Then, as happens in all comic books, he gets drafted to be part of a super-secret U.S. experiment to become a super soldier. Super. With a few hypodermic shots of blue goo liquid, enclosure in a sarcophagus–looking contraption that shoots off blasts of light and yellow sparkles, Rogers is remade unto an Olympian god -- tall, and stacked with ripped muscles and a square jaw. That’s how the real Evans looks like. Hereafter, all the footage of High School Me is cast aside.

Long plot short: The newly dubbed Captain America must fight the Red Skull, who is every bit evil as Rogers is good. Skull, real name Schmidt (Hugo Weaving), thinks Hitler is too cautious, slow. He wants to move the war up a notch or eight. Cue the sci-fi gadgets and secret bases, and Igor-like lab assistant. I know the comics by heart, so I wasn’t surprised by any plot point, although wildly thrilled that comic book sidekick Bucky Barnes has been moved up from Robin rip-off to Rogers’ bigger friend. He’s played by Sebastian Stan, going full Errol Flynn. Brilliant move.

Also on hand: Marvel Comic’s Howling Commandos. And this is the only major grind I have with the film: It’s World War II, and this unit is a group of various races and backgrounds, an English man, a Japanese man, and an African-American. Oh, it plays well now, it feels good and shows the best wishes of America as a melting pot nation, but for the period – it’s an outright lie. The American military during World War II was segregated, with racism rampant from on top all the way down. (Click here for a fantastic “New York Times” column on the matter.) Japanese men and women were incarcerated in camps across the nation. Fact. I know, some folks will say there was no racism then, such accusations are an evil liberal lie. They also say our Founding Fathers ended slavery. These lies are deliberate, as Orwell taught us, he who controls the past, controls the future. The Tea Party is not about patriotism, but absolute control. Fact.

Now I digress again. See, the great idea of Captain America – his 1940s inception, the comic books and this movie – is what’s best about America: We are not sickly wrong, but we will always find our way and do the right thing, whatever the cost. We want to and long to be Captain America, not fragile Steve Rogers.

Joe Johnston, the director, made the similar “Rocketeer” when I was in high school, and the lone hero against Nazis plot abides, as is it does in the brilliant “Raiders of the Lost Ark,” where Indiana Jones first cracked a whip. No, “Captain America’ isn’t that good. Few films are. Rather, this super hero epic conjures up 1960s flicks such as “The Dirty Dozen” or “Where Eagles Dare,“ where the complicated plot dies at the third act, and the “attack the fort” boy’s war dream takes over.

Bonus points for the brains to show Cap clocking Hitler, the perfect moment of comic book history. Perfect movie? Perfect comic book come to life? Yes. I am biased to like this, and admit it, having owned a vertically enhanced Captain America action figure when I was a child. The action figure -- NOT a doll, OK, it was doll. I digress. Again. Whatever. May every film Marvel makes be this good; red, white and blue and clocking evil in the chin. B+