Still catching up to significant and newish
films watched… I open with current box office beast “Jurassic World” -– seen at
a preview -– and then hit on older films. All quick. Run!
Jurassic World (2015) comes
as close as any of the sequels to 1993 Spielberg classic “Jurassic Park” to capturing
the sheer terror/joy of dinosaurs run amok in the modern world. Running the
show here is indie darling Colin Trevorrow (“SafetyNot Guaranteed”) as director and one of four writers. Plot? Humans foolishly open
an amusement park full of DNA-juiced dinosaurs who do what dinosaurs do. Hunt.
Kill. Chris Pratt -– hot off “Guardians of the Galaxy” -– is the hero who knows
what’s right. Kids get lost. People die. Dinosaurs roar loud. Our eyes fill. Our
ears relent. It’s damn entertaining and smart with its knowing of the first film’s events as real and its place in Hollywood.
Trevorrow knows how to sell action. But this “World” is Lost: It’s disgustingly
sexist. Bryce Dallas Howard plays a Corporate Career Bitch who needs a man and
a tragedy to crack her shell so she can swoon. Every other female is a basket
case of tears and panic. Fuck that. Not after “Mad Max: Fury Road.” Trevorrow
homages “Aliens” on screen, but it’s clear he never learned what made that film
soar. There’s no Ripley here. Not by 65 million years. B
Bill Murray is at low-key best as a recluse who
only thinks he wants to be a loner, until he learns – via a hand-written letter
– that he is a father in director Jim Jarmusch’s epically cool Broken Flowers (2005). A-
Dr.
Who and the Daleks
(1965) ignores the plot of then-new BBC
hit show about a time-traveling alien and makes the hero a doddering old human grandpa
(Peter Cushing!) with an eye for gadgets. Result: Goofy silly 1960s fun with
pop art sets and a Doctor who doesn’t do much but wink. Often. B
Dracula Untold (2014) serves an origin story we didn’t need with Luke Evans as the
warlord count who goes to the dark side. Unmemorable and visually bland. Against
“Bram Stoker’s Dracula,” it sucks. C
The ever-lovely Julia Louis-Dreyfus takes center
stage in Enough Said (2013) as a
woman who falls for her new BFF’s ex-husband. A romantic comedy that is purely
adult, smart, and hilarious. ‘Nuf said. A-
Horrible Bosses 2 (2014) feels like an unnecessary sequel. The first installment was
dirty, wonderfully funny. But Jason Bateman, Charlie Day, and Jason Sudekis had
me laughing my ass off, constantly. B+
Clint Eastwood had two films in 2014: New war
classic “American Sniper,” and musical-turned-movie Jersey Boys (2014), a flick that pops when the music is on, but
flat lines everywhere else. Literally, when a college-age daughter succumbs off
screen, one could think it was from boredom rather bad drugs. C+
The Maze Runner (2014) adapts a dystopian book about a teen boy trapped inside a
closed-off world, surrounded by only boys. No adults. It feels very “Lord ofthe Flies,” and sure enough the fat nerd buys it. B
The less said about Johnny Depp and his mustache
comedy bit in Mortedcai (2015), the
better. Look at Gwyneth Paltrow’s face, she’s smiling so damn hard I kept
thinking, “It’s CG!” Truly, honestly awful. D-
Dickens novel turned musical Oliver! (1968) won Best Picture over not-nominated “Producers,” “2001,”
and “Rosemary’s Baby.” Criminal? Yes. But the film -– overlong and overdone (the
“Who Will Buy?” bit is asinine back lot studio shit) –- isn’t terrible. Jack
Wild as Artful Dodger is amazingly gifted. When he’s on screen, my God, the
film jumps. The kid playing Oliver?
Dubbed. By a twentysomething woman. B-
Drama/comedy This is Where I Leave You (2014) has Jane Fonda as the mom of a
rowdy lot. It’s funny, but when adult characters moan while sitting on the roof
a huge house, I think, “White People Problems.” B-
I recently sat in awe of the “new” cut of Orson
Welles’ Touch of Evil (1958). The
drowned opener is back, as are missing scenes that make the plot of murder,
drugs, and blackmail along the U.S.-Mexican border finally click. Charlton
Heston’s half-Mexican cop is angrier. Welles’ fat, evil cop Hank Quinlan is more
perverse, and he’s long been one of cinema’s worst pigs. This 1998 re-edit –
made to Welles’ specifications that were studio steamrolled – makes an already
dark film shock with new grit. See it. A