The Man with the Iron Fists (2012)

When hip-hop guru RZA (aka Robert Diggs) scored Quentin Tarantino’s “Kill Bill,” he apparently liked what he saw on set so much he opted to star, write, and direct his own martial arts entry, “The Man with the Iron Fists.” 

Akin to “Bill,” this entry is soaked in 1970s cinema with yellow-splatter-font credits and lots of blood and wonky theatrics to make it all retro. RZA is the titular hero, a runaway U.S. slave in late 1800s China, working as a blacksmith who gets mixed up in a gold theft involving a clan leader (Byron Mann), a whorehouse madam (Lucy Liu), and a Brit knife/gunslinger (Russell Crowe), plus 99 other characters I dare not list. Hence the title, our hero loses his hands but comes back punching. 

RZA is high on an admirable labor-of-love vibe, but “Fists” is fugly and scattershot, with blitzed editing that ruins every fight scene. There’s no majesty or cool factor to the choreographed violence, just chopped-up limbs and blood, and almost all CGI on the latter. 

Worse, as an actor, RZA confuses lifeless with stoic, and that leaves a massive hero hole in a 95-minute film that feels kitchen-sink garbled and amateurish. D+