I have let my blog sit silent for months now for
various reasons, mainly life got busy, I busted my right, dominant hand
(resulting in a surgery, with more to come), and my main means of seeing new,
independent films has escaped me, or rather, I’m not able to go anymore. Not every film I saw
these past months is covered, but quite enough…
In Ex
Machina (2015), screenwriter Alex
Garland (28 Days later, Dredd) makes his directing debut with a near-future
sci-fi drama that’s some about AI, robotics, privacy, and the power of
corporate geniuses, but much about the objectification of women. Domhnall
Gleeson is a coder for a mega-corp Google clone that gets an invite by its
founder (Oscar Issac) to visit the latter’s home for a product test. The
product? A stunningly realistic AI robot named Ava (Alicia
Vikander, amazing). The geek is told by the boss to test the robot, Turing
style. But that’s the film seen in trailers. What it’s really about is how men -– rich/poor, brilliant/average, nerd/geek –- see women only through the gaze of
body and ourselves, our desire to be the hero. Garland’s
stunning, scary, smart thriller may make his fan-boy audience squirm. Early on,
Ava tells Gleeson’s employee not to trust the boss, but she well knows on instinct: Nearly no
man can be trusted. A
After a rocky opening battle that fumbles with a
painful mash-up of must-have glory action shots that seem studio-mandated, Joss
Whedon’s massive franchise sequel The
Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015) finds its grove and far surpasses the 2012installment that broke box office records worldwide. Again bringing back Iron
Man (Robert Downey Jr.), Captain America (Chris Evans), Thor (Chris Hemsworth),
Hulk (Mark Ruffallo in human form) and Black Widow (Scarlett Johannsson),
“Ultron” pits out heroes against nothing alien, but something manmade.
Specifically, Tony Stark made: A wildly sarcastic and egotistical AI robot
named Ultron, as evilly crooked as Stark is coolly jagged, and voiced by a
purring James Spader. As required
in every comic book movie, entire cities must be laid to waste as heroes battle
villains, and there are many close calls. Whedon knocks a homerun on two
fronts: A lead character dies, another goes into exile, and yet
another hero turns out to have a secret life on a farm, and in those quiet moments, Whedon’s writing, our actors, and our heroes are
allowed to breathe. Kudos to the Iron Man vs. Hulk scene. It does a comic book
nerd proud. B+
At some point Russell Crowe as a haunted father
and widower in The Water Diviner (2015) makes
a faux pas against a woman, pouring on bullshit macho bravado. He begs
forgiveness for laying it on thick. Which is funny as “Diviner” marks Crowe’s
directorial debut and, despite many a stunning scene here and there, and great
camera work by the late Andrew Lesnie, the man sure pours on the emotion thick
and heavy. Here, tragic deaths play out in super slow motion and big music
because Crowe doesn’t want us to miss a single moment. Later, Crowe and an
unsure romantic interest (Olga Kurylenko) just have to eat dinner by candlelight, about 1,111 candles. Syrup. The plot has Crowe’s Australian
farmer traveling to Gallipoli to claim the bodies of his three sons, killed in
the infamous 1915 battle. Now that’s harsh. But fascinating. Crowe can sell
it as an actor. But as director? When his WASP farmer runs into battle
with Turks against Greeks… Really? C
On a 007 kick, I caught Sean Connery’s You Only Live Twice (1969) and Roger
Moore’s For Your Eyes Only (1981), both
with the actors past caring. Connery looks bored as James Bond investigates a
series of space capsule disappearances, in the process literally going Japanese
to track down master villain Blofeld (Donald Pleasance). Now, I dig all the 007
trappings (volcano headquarters!) but this entry makes me cringe. First:
Ninjas? Really? Second: When Connery as Bond gets shaved and dons –- I can’t say
it any other way -- “Yellow Man” makeup to look Japanese, I walked away. The
shit is shamefully racist. And the filmmakers know it. Just as I couldn’t stand
another second, Connery is Bond again, brogue and hairy as a Sasquatch. Someone
must have looked the dailies. Now, Moore in “Eyes,” what can I say, he’s
looking at 60 and catching the eyes of girls 18. Moore knows it’s bad. The plot
is very “Thunderball”: Race the bad guys for an underwater McGuffin that can do
… something important. The whole thing is so dull, I can only suggest the radio
friendly theme song. Twice: C- Eyes:
C
Dystopian youth sci-fi thriller and official
franchise sequel Insurgent (2015)
fails to do what 2014’s “Divergent” barely succeeded at: Covering the stench of
its DOA premise. In near-future, blown-up Chicago, all people are divided up
into camps dependent on their dominant feature: Giving, loyal, honest, brainy,
aggressive, etc. To carry two traits is a crime. Our hero (Shailene
Woodley) has them all because, well, doesn’t every fuckin’ person have multiple
traits?!? The actors try hard, especially Miles Teller as a weasel who trades
sides because, well, he also is a regular person. Woodley deserves a better
series.
D+
D+
Rollerball (2002) takes the dull James Caan-starring 1975 sci-fi film of the same
name and turns it into a film so disastrously bad, I can’t stomach the thought
of it again. Block of wood Chris Klein – hey, he looks like a nice guy, but
he’s still a block of wood – is a jock who flees the U.S. over a skateboard
crime (!?!?!) and ends up in some backwater Third World country, playing an
uber-violent form of football on wheels for money. When Klein’s blockhead
realizes violent sports actually result in violence, he flees with best pal LL
Cool J into a strange world where everything is in night vision. Or something. F
Melissa McCarthy does a John Belushi lovable
slob bit in Tammy (2014) and she
pulls it off, especially with huge doses of help from Susan Sarandon and Kathy
Bates. But, damn it, enough with big life lessons
and family hugs. I don’t need “After School Special.” C
Seth McFarlane tries for Mel Brooks territory with
cowboy spoof A Million Ways to Die in
the West (2014). Brooks was a master of
self-deprecation. McFarlane is just a painfully smug bastard in love with his
own jokes. C-
Neighbors (2014) puts a nice spin on “Animal House.” What about the poor bastards
who had to live near all that shit? Seth Rogen and Rose Byrne are
thirtysomethings and new parents loving their hip college town until the empty
house next door gets bought up by a fraternity. Run by Zac Efron. Hijinks (and
high jinks) ensue. The movie is far funnier than it has any right to be, if not
quite overlong. B
Rogen also stars in The Interview (2014) with James Franco. Y’know the one. North Korea
threatened war over it. Cyber-terrorists threatened cinemas. Sony was hacked.
The FBI got involved. Obama, too. All over a comedy satire that is so … not
worth it. The plot: Rogen produces and Franco stars in a trash TV talk show.
When NK dictator Kim Jung-Un’s minions suggest an interview, our lads jump at
the chance. Ratings and glory. The CIA has different plans. The agency wants
the duo to kill Kim. Oh, yeah, North Korea got pissed. But really they need not
worry. Rogen and Franco flagellate themselves with so many corny, vulgar “we love
each other, but not that way!” jokes, maybe all those hacks and threats came
from the gay community. Watch “The Great
Dictator” instead. B-
Franco appears in Homefront (2013) as a Louisiana meth dealer against Jason Statham, who plays a single dad with a past that involves three
letters and a U.S. federal agency. I can’t recall which one. Who cares?
I mean, Statham versus Franco? OK, I laughed my ass off. But the film –- written by Sylvester Stallone –- scores points with
solid characters and motives. Franco’s villain is not evil, but he is desperate. That’s far interesting turf. B
Did we need an Annie (2014) remake? I have no idea. This at least shakes
up the game: The setting is present day. The main cast is African American. Quvenzhané
Wallis plays Annie. Jamie Foxx is Will Stacks (ne Warbucks.) Cameron Diaz is
Hannigan, but a shrieking, overacting mess at it. The story is mostly the same,
but the music has a harder time. Wallis and her kid pals beautifully sing “The Sun Will Come Out.” But when Foxx
tackles crap R&B Auto-Tune, the end can’t come soon enough. That’s
no slam against Foxx. Just the music choices. C+
Karen Gillan and some guy I can’t recall play
estranged sister and brother in Oculus
(2013), one of those haunted family/house suspense thrillers. Poor Gillan -– I loved her in “Doctor
Who” –- spends more time explaining
the story than playing out the story. C+
I saw A
Fish Called Wanda (1988) at age 14 and I’m sure I didn’t get half the
jokes. Now I’m older and the jokes only get better. Nearly a Monty Python
reunion, John Cleese and Michael Palin are just two of a very odd bunch
involved in a jewelry store robbery, with Jamie Lee Curtis and Kevin Kline
rounding out the cast. Amazing, wonderfully vulgar and a bit mean, this is comedy. No punches pulled. No
fish spared. A
John Wick (2014) is a shocking surprise. From out of nowhere. The plot is
amazingly simply on its face: You killed my puppy, prepare to die. Yes, puppy.
Puppy belonged to John Wick (Keanu Reeves), an ex-hitman who left the job after
marrying, only to lose his wife to cancer. Her last gift: You got it, right? So
when Russian thug Alfie Allen (“Game of Thrones”) kills the baby pooch in a
misguided home invasion, Wick goes full Neo Plus 10 and starts a massacre one
must see to believe. I truly loved this film. It’s simplicity. And wit, with
assassins meeting up in a Manhattan bar. And the action is all eye-popping,
wide-eyed long shots of Reeves -– miles better than he has been in years -– going ballistic. A-
Action/comedy Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015) is so gloriously offensive and
violent, one has to see it to describe it. And it is not for all tastes. I
can’t think of a more shocking -– gleefully so -– film in many a year. How often
can I say that? Plot: Colin Firth is part of a secret Brit spy club known as
the Kingsmen, the top of the top and all that 007 nonsense. Getting on to his
50s, Firth recruits a kid punk (Taron Egerton) to take his place. This kid
steals cars for fun. Meanwhile, Blofeld-meets-Steve-Jobs madman Samuel L.
Jackson is planning a leftist worldwide attack to kill off humanity in order to save the Earth. They’ll all meet up, but never how
you expect. Nothing in this film will hit you as expected. Sure it’s a Brit spy spoof, but nothing like that was ever
made. Until Matthew Vaughn came around. In full “Kick Ass” mode and again using
a comic book source, we see a heinous massacre in a right-wing church and a
literal chorus of exploding heads at 1600 … I’ll stop. Truly, madly, deeply, I
wish more films were like this. I left gasping. A
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