Leon, a.k.a., The Professional (1994) and The Fifth Element (1997)

Director Luc Besson was ambitious during the 1990s, hot off his French hit “La Femme Nikita,” about a troubled woman trained to become an assassin back when such ideas were, “Whoa, who woulda thunk?” (Recall, this was long before the silly “Lucy.”

“Leon” –- known in the U.S. as “The Professional” –- offers a spin on that as a 12-year-old NYC girl (Natalie Portma, in her debut) is taken in by a hitman (Jean Reno) after her uncaring, vile family is murdered by DEA thugs. She mourns only her toddler brother. Gary Oldman is the head DEA agent, an evil freak who pops Quaaludes like chocolate. Young Matoilda wants to learn the assassin trade to kill Oldman and his badged thugs. Leon reluctantly agrees. But Matilda is troubled as she mistakes adoration for a fatherly figure for sexual attraction. In a huge misstep, Besson introduces this dynamic and then runs away from it. He opts for massive, very artsy gunplay instead, and it is wildly entertaining, the entire long climax involving Leon and every cop in the city. My college pals all loved the film, but I still find it a bit too loose for its own good. Oldman’s cop is far more amusing than dangerous. Put this guy up against any Joe Pesci character from the era, he’d fold like pancake batter. Reno has never been better. And I knew back then Portman was something to behold: Tragic, funny, confused, angry; she amazes. B

 “Fifth Element” gleefully torches any set standard. Oldman returns as the villain, doing a twisted take on -– I gather -– Marvin the Martian as an arms dealer out to steal precious alien stones that could save Earth from annihilation. Oldman’s Jean-Baptiste Emmanuel Zorg (awesome name!) insists he’ll make money off the ensuing chaos. A Republican? No matter. He’s up against Bruce Willis as Korben Dallas, ex-soldier turned cab driver in 23rd century Brooklyn. By winking coincidence, Korben has stumbled on Earth’s new savior, a fiery ginger head named Leeloo (Milla Jovovich). Part action/comedy, “Firth” is a love letter to “Star Wars” and “Blade Runner” -– both made when Besson was a teen. He spills references -- Leia hair buns, a familiar brown robe, and Brion James (RIP) – so fast, they fly by. “Fifth” also is a must for oddball film score buffs, thank you, Eric Serra. The best joke: Willis’ hero and Oldman’s villain never meet, separated by the most (purposefully) contrived circumstances. VIP is Chris Tucker as an androgynous DJ who ends up narrating the action. Some found his Ruby Rhod a disaster, I love the WTF attitude of him (her?). A-

Lucy and RoboCop (both 2014)

Remember that “better, stronger, faster” intro from “Six Million Dollar Man,” with the TV astronaut who escapes death with a new bod and brain to rival Superman? 

Recent films “Lucy” and “RoboCop” -– the latter a remake of the classic 1987 gallows-humor action flick –- replay that tune, respectively following a woman (Scarlett Johansson) who becomes an unstoppable fighter/thinker after she ingests a fantastical drug, and an honest cop (Joel Kinnaman) who’s reborn as a cyborg after being blown to bits in Detroit.

Packed with loads of potential, both fall short of better, stronger, or faster.

At least “Lucy” is quick-paced at less than 90-minutes as our heroine goes from unwilling drug mule to omnipotent hero within 24 hours. Luc Besson directs screaming preacher style that if only humans were smarter, we’d kill each other less, in between long glorious shots of ultra-cool people slaughtering each other in fab fab fab slo-mo action. Seriously, Besson wants us to leave thinking peace and love, but after four bloodbath massacres and untold car crashes, who is he kidding? Morgan Freeman plays a scientist who utters, “I just hope we will be worthy of your sacrifice,” and somehow keeps from laughing as SJ goes on a nature-filled time bender that outs Besson as a Terrence Malick/Doctor Who mash-up fan-fiction writer. Johansson is spectacular and long past due her own Marvel film. B-

The new “RoboCop” starts strong with Samuel L. Jackson as a Glenn Beck-type screaming about glorious freedom, before we jump to a near-future terrified Iran patrolled by robots and drones made in the U.S. of A. “Bring it here!,” SLJ’s right-wing nut demands, as any wrong move gets a man or woman or child slaughtered onscreen. Freedom means obeying. I thought this new RoboCop is going international, after the NSA, CIA, and Cheney’s shoot first manta, and – stop! -- we’re back in Detroit, stuck with the same 1987 plot bucket of evil corporation, human overcoming robotics, kingpin villains, and corrupt cops, all with a limiting PG-13 rating. Fox News is an easy target, and the Detroit in this dystopian America fails to match the current grim reality. Talk about tone deaf. Imagine a war satire so sharp it makes Bush and Obama wince. That film played in my head as I tried to stay awake here. C-

Three Days to Kill (2014)

Kevin Costner goes a long way in selling “Three Days to Kill,” a Luc Besson-produced action/“comedy” about a dying CIA assassin named Ethan who goes home to Paris to see his estranged family – Connie Nielsen as wife, and Hailee Steinfeld as teen daughter – before he kicks. As it happens, the CIA has one last job for Ethan: Kill two bad guys known as The Albino and The Wolf, who are neither an albino nor a wolf. Golden carrot: Way-too young CIA handler Vivi (Amber Heard) has a magic cure that can keep our man alive. Costner acts aces, truly. But “Kill” made my skin crawl. I’ll say it: Besson shines a creep perv voyeur for teen girls here and with “Taken” and his so-long-ago “Leon.” He fixates on girls who cannot walk outside without falling victim to rape, not without “daddy” to save them. Steinfeld’s teen gets the treatment here. Besson’s fantasy? The take on grad-school-age Vivi as some 1980s Euro-fantasy dominatrix smells of a gross dream of middle-aged men with script approval. Nielsen’s wife has nothing to do but forgive her man, repeatedly. Blame director McG? No. This hangs on Besson. Dickless. D+

The Family (2013)

Robert De Niro and Michelle Pfeiffer play husband and wife in the comedy-drama “The Family” which follows a mob-connected clan unable to keep their New Yawk F.U. attitude in check while living in rural France under witness protection. Dad pummels a shady plumber with a hammer, mom blows up a grocery for its lack of peanut butter, while the children (Dianna Argo and David Belle) pull of blackmail and crush anyone who crosses them. Tommy Lee Jones, haggard and grouchy as always, plays the haggard and grouchy U.S. federal agent who has to keep the family safe from assassins. See, De Niro’s dad snitched his mafia bosses and is now wanted. Director Luc Besson -– he made “The Professional” –- eyes slapstick comedy upfront, and drama and suspense later, asking us to sympathize with these hard-ass ’Mericans when the guns come. It’s an ugly shift: We’re not talking Bernstein Bears here. This family proudly dishes cruelty, yet when tables turn, suddenly violence is wrong? (Never mind the high body count of innocents.) Love the “Goodfellas” bit, though. B-

From Paris with Love (2010)

At one point in “From Paris with Love,” John Travolta’s mad-dog CIA super assassin orders food from McDonalds, and he drops the three words that returned the actor to fame 16 long years ago. “Royale with cheese!” But this isn’t Tarantino. It’s Luc Besson, still floundering after a mid-1990s string of hip hits, on screenplay, and Pierre Morel in the director’s chair. These guys made “Taken,” with Liam Neeson as a mad-dog CIA hit man out for blood. Travolta’s Charlie Wax also is out for blood, but I can’t recall why. Drug runners. Assassins. Bad Chinese food. An uptight U.S. Embassy assistant (Jonathan Rhys Meyers) who yearns to be a famous CIA hit man. Whatever. As with “Taken,” we have a ridiculously high body count; proud and bloody anti-woman plot points; and a stink eye for anyone not, umm, European. A perfect entertainment for right-wing fanatics. “Pulp Fiction”? Non, monsieur. C-