The Internship (2013)

Even if you haven’t seen “The Internship,” you’ve seen it. Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson reprise their tired roles as the 40-year-old past-cool frat boys from a dozen prior movies. You know the map: The best-pal guys are cool king cats who get blown low, mope, find a crazy angle to hit it big, and against all odds succeed and learn to be real adults. Credits. Nothing new. Even the fuck granny jokes play like repeats a decade old. But, damn it, I laughed when these guys con their way into gigs as Google interns, competing against tech geeks half their age and double their IQ. I got suckered. The hook: Vaughn and Wilson are roped into a Quidditch match, the actual field game inspired by Harry Potter and played by thousands of college youth. “Who the fuck is that?,” Wilson asks, dumb founded as a man in a glittery gold outfit takes the grass. It’s a comedy of generational divide, yes, repetitive, yes, and definitely too long, but I got it. I work on a college campus, where students play Quidditch, and I knew what Wilson spoke of. B

Only Lovers Left Alive (2014)

Art House Golden Rule: One must love Jim Jarmusch, he of “Night on Earth.” But his latest film is “Only Lovers Left Alive,” a vampire flick that itself seems eternal, a dark slog made for Gen Xers who covered their dorm walls with Trent Reznor posters, and still have only one weekly load of laundry: Black and very, very dark gray. I squirmed as 120+ minutes ticked by. Oh, Jarmusch spins amazing ideas on death of innovation -– music, poetry, the American car –- in a world of YouTube fame. Mass consumerism is the true mark of the undead. But, damn, how many slo-mo shots do we get of Tilda Swinton stalking down Tangiers alleyways as fat guys leer? She and Tom Hiddleston (Loki from “Thor”) are husband and wife, her living in North Africa with books, he in Detroit with his music, bemoaning the death of the once-thriving metropolis that gave us Chevys. I tried to bite and drink, but the Jack White as a vampire joke? Wooden stake. “Only” only comes alive when luminous Mia Wasikowski appears as a bloodsucker with no self-control. She’s sent packing too soon. C+